Confessions of a Hacker

Sure, I bet I get tons of hate for this but you should all see the inner working of a superior player. NOOBZ.  

   It all started in school: all the other kids were totally jealous of me so I didn't have many friends. LOL OVERRATED! Mom spent most of our cash at the casinos and dad would go straight from jail to the bar. So I had plenty of spare time to learn code.
   HA howd U spend your lame childhood?!?!?! ROFL U MAD BRO?
   Anyways, when I was 22 mom had a good night at the slots and bought me an Xbox so that she could spend all night gambling without worrying about me getting a girl pregnant.
    I used my birthday money from grandma to buy Dark Souls because I heard how it was soooooo hard LOL - more like broken!  Everybody was already good at PvP and nobody would give me any good gear when I pointed down  . Unfair advantage much? LOL BROKEN! so I decided to fix the game.

   Everything I did was totally in the game - MAX HP was meant to be accessed, I just got it sooner than you NOOBZ.
   But some of you cheating skill-less scrubs still managed to beat me. WTF!
   So I gave myself infinite health - because winners deserve to win and I'm a winner.
If FROM didn't want me doing this, theyd do something about it. If Microsoft didn't want me winning, they'd do something about it, right? RIGHT?  
    
   I'm not scared of any of you. Now, I can beat any of you noobz with my level 1.  But there are some lonely nights when I reflect on the power that I have. How I've never known the touch of another person and how I have taken the meaning from something that others enjoy. But then I remember that this isn't just a game: it's the only thing that I'm good at!

   Still, I'm concerned that Ive become a slave to my hacks. Now I need hacks just to stay competitive cuz all these cheaters are out there modding the game. LOSERZ!
    All you noobz think that just because I'm an alpha tier player that I'm not a victim.  If you lose you can just shrug your shoulders and claim that it was do to some "unsporting advantage" LOL but if I lose, I look like the saddest human being on the planet.

  You see, when I take no damage while making  gestures as you hack away at me and send a voice message calling you a 'noob', what I am really saying is that "I hate myself and so does everybody else."

PM me if you want my gamertag for a duel. NOOBZ!
Prepare to see

Sorry for the lame meme. It was the best I could do with my epic lack of imagination.

inb4ban

Ban him!

I'm thinking it is someone's second account made purely for trolling.

See, there were already more than enough joke threads, but this is just plain obnoxious, even though this was made purely due to some twisted outrage/boredom.

Well, I could be wrong. When I created my account, I started a thread that was so inflammatory that people accused me of creating a second account.   

Lame troll is lame.

This seems to just be a troll, just one that doesn't have their caps lock conveniently broken. The real question for me, is who is behind it. A new member, a 2nd account, or aliens?

I don't really care enough to find out.

Why are people even replying? The only way to make sure the troll gets no satisfaction is to stop giving replies and let this thread slide down the front page and disappear. And yes, I realize the hypocrisy in replying to tell people to stop replying. I wish this board had a sage function.

There's really no confessions here.

I mean if he said he rubbed one out while hacking or doing the  gesture, well then that's one thing, but......

Is it weird that I didn't giggle?

Not even a wittle?

Cmon at least do something original like making a Magic Conch in Off topic, and answering people's questions.

I was actually gonna post this guys name in the mod section asking why they allowed him in... Guess I was right

Since OP isn't making this fun with replies I'm gonna lock this up. Trolling is against the rules, and I suggest you makes some productive posts instead of trolling