The "let it out" thread.

Sounds to me like you're unhappy because you're stuck where you are Tart. I had sort of a similar thing going on when I was in high school. I had friends I went out with, and I did do some shallow high school dating, but I was lonely. I felt like I wasn't really going anywhere, like my life was stagnant and nobody really truly understood me. My friends were great. We went out and partied a lot and had a good time, but there wasn't much depth to most of those relationships. Once you're done with high school you're not tied down anymore though. That's what happened with me. I graduated and found a place with more people like me and moved there. You find out a lot more about yourself once you're in a position to make decisions that have a larger impact on your life too. I'm a completely different person than I was when I was 18. Still play games for sure. Still have some of the same friends, but my priorities and my outlook are completely 100% different. That's one of the lamest things about high school. You're pretty much just stuck where you are, doing what you're doing, forced to go through the motions. It's necessary to get what you want out of higher ed though, and it won't last forever. The situation for sure and the feelings if you don't let them.

Ya know, I've really  been struggling with having any sort of initiative to maintain my forum  account here with any amount of organization and discipline.

I've made some pretty cool threads, and have "favorited" some pretty cool ones as well.  I had grandiose plans of organizing the ultimate "magic resource" thread, maybe "the best of off-topics" or something along those lines.

But anymore, I just feel people are tired as hell of Dark Souls and the same old discussions of what is poor  etiquette  and what is proper.

I guess I figured by now, these things should be known, accepted, and influencing an organized effort to create an environment with  easy access to like minded people.  Instead, we seem to find that although the souls community is large and active indeed, there is a huge divide between the "honor brigade" and the "****wraiths" so to speak.

Imo, the problem always has been, and always will be an elitist attitude.  Dark Souls players that feel because its in the game, it should be dealt with and not tabooed.  Something I think is ridiculous.

For instance TWoP and dead angling WoG should never be accepted as an "okay" tactic to use.

I thought for sure there would be these ENORMOUS fight clubs already established (especially a sl 55 fight club in this forum) that created a plethora of rules defining what was taboo, and what was not.  Instead it seems, the only active fight club here is one with almost no rules.  It makes me not even want to venture out into another forum to see if a more complicated fight club would exist.  I would create one, but....meh...no one seems interested.

I guess its a sign that Dark Souls and Demon's Souls might have finally stayed its welcome in my heart, and a long stay it's been indeed....makes me sad  

I would love to finish the mystery poise tables complete with all castings and running attacks, I'd love to finish my "Battle of the Builds" Tournament (I originally named it T.I.T.S. ....it was awesome), or maybe even join some of these fight clubs and try to organize some rules that would help to make the poor gimply mid-rolling tank build more viable.  But alas, the steam seems to be gone.

I am really disappointed in the community right now, and how the "play to win" mentality has ruined the experience for the fresh blood we got from the DLC release.

I guess I just expected more, and the let down is really taking a toll on any drive I had left to try and make the last super active moments of Dark Souls awesome before the release of Dark Souls 2.

This feeling makes me feel like I'm letting the great people of Lordran down....there's so much potential there.  I don't know what to do.

Animaaal wrote:Ya know, I've really  been struggling with having any sort of initiative to maintain my forum  account here with any amount of organization and discipline.

I've made some pretty cool threads, and have "favorited" some pretty cool ones as well.  I had grandiose plans of organizing the ultimate "magic resource" thread, maybe "the best of off-topics" or something along those lines.

But anymore, I just feel people are tired as hell of Dark Souls and the same old discussions of what is poor  etiquette  and what is proper.

I guess I figured by now, these things should be known, accepted, and influencing an organized effort to create an environment with  easy access to like minded people.  Instead, we seem to find that although the souls community is large and active indeed, there is a huge divide between the "honor brigade" and the "****wraiths" so to speak.

Imo, the problem always has been, and always will be an elitist attitude.  Dark Souls players that feel because its in the game, it should be dealt with and not tabooed.  Something I think is ridiculous.

For instance TWoP and dead angling WoG should never be accepted as an "okay" tactic to use.

I thought for sure there would be these ENORMOUS fight clubs already established (especially a sl 55 fight club in this forum) that created a plethora of rules defining what was taboo, and what was not.  Instead it seems, the only active fight club here is one with almost no rules.  It makes me not even want to venture out into another forum to see if a more complicated fight club would exist.  I would create one, but....meh...no one seems interested.

I guess its a sign that Dark Souls and Demon's Souls might have finally stayed its welcome in my heart, and a long stay it's been indeed....makes me sad  

I would love to finish the mystery poise tables complete with all castings and running attacks, I'd love to finish my "Battle of the Builds" Tournament (I originally named it T.I.T.S. ....it was awesome), or maybe even join some of these fight clubs and try to organize some rules that would help to make the poor gimply mid-rolling tank build more viable.  But alas, the steam seems to be gone.

I am really disappointed in the community right now, and how the "play to win" mentality has ruined the experience for the fresh blood we got from the DLC release.

I guess I just expected more, and the let down is really taking a toll on any drive I had left to try and make the last super active moments of Dark Souls awesome before the release of Dark Souls 2.

This feeling makes me feel like I'm letting the great people of Lordran down....there's so much potential there.  I don't know what to do.

I thought for a long time about what I was going to say here, but... I came up with nothing, instead, I am going to try to say something else, not something I had in mind.

As times goes on, people will start to stray from the more "Ideal" and the rules laid out in general, because they feel that, as their competition start to get better and better, and they stay at their own level of skill, so they have to turn to less "Honourable" tactics to stay at the same level as everyone else, making it a spiral down until it stays at the chaotic level it's now.

In the end, though, I would have to agree, while I haven't been a member of this forum for a long time, I was a very frequent visitor of the forum since the release of the game (Long before I bought the game).

I hope that one day, you will be able to find a new spark with motivation, and perhaps help this declining community reach back to the once honourable position it once held.

To anyone who was insulted or feel like I was insensitive, I had no intention of coming across that way. Feel free to contact me in PM so that we can sort it out.

Animaaal, the issues on this are pretty complex but if you're a fan of the Dark Tower by Stephen King you might recognize what's happening to Lordran.

It's winding down.

The desolate land is plagued by harriers and low men and the righteous few have fallen one by one in great battles.

No warrior is eternal, despite the bonfires which draw us back. We meet our ends in many ways, but meet them we do.

A few warriors still try to summon their kin with the Horn of Eld. Whether it's a call to arms, a celebration of shared times or just simply to hang out. But these days, those that answer are few.

The world is grinding to a halt. The beams that brought us here are being broken and the way becomes lost.

Those few who have stayed have hope for salvation. A new world is on the horizon. Until that time, we bide ourselves with our ka-tet, our forum family.

@Animaaal - I actually agree with you 100% on that. But, honestly, I've come around to just accepting it's not a battle worth having.

Some people see those sorts of things as "part of the game" and nothing you say or do will sway them. To that I say, "so be it," it's not worth the frustration.

Dark Tower FTW! Some of my favorite books of all time.

For what it's worth, as long as the rules are creative/do something not usually seen, I would totally be down for a strange fight club.

For me, it all depends on who I'm playing as; My invader is a "****", Win at All Costs, because I'm invading; I'm not here to make your game better, I'm here to make it miserable.

My Faith Character is my Duelist, and I follow the respected rules with him.


My problem, and the reason why I find myself playing less and less, is because there just isn't anything new to do. Faith Caster? Done. PyroCaster? Done. Int Caster? Done. Mixed? Done. Tank? Done.

Low level invasions? I'm a jerk, not an a-hole. Gank Squads? Meh.

I wanted to get a group of people for SL 20 PVP at various spots like Painting Roof, Ceaseless Bridge, and similar, but I only got two people interested in it both of whom were PS3. :/


Now, to let it out;


I applied for a job I NEED (Location Location Location), and have yet to hear back from them. It's been three weeks, I'm fairly certain they've had the time to do a back ground check and talk to my references.


Also, my plan for making a flying car has been delayed, as my mechanic friend's ball and chain suddenly got a lot heavier for no reason..... How in the world am I supposed to get this done SOON if I have to research EVERYTHING about it?!?

I have extreme self-confidence issues, to the point where it's detrimental to my life and I don't know what to do about it.

When I was little, my sisters picked on me constantly.  Through all of elementary school I was bullied.  Very rarely was it physical abuse, though, and it was almost entirely emotional attacks.  Constantly being called stupid by my sisters and cousins, while at school getting made fun of because I made good grades.  Isn't that contrast interesting?  I had no idea what to make of it.  They say if you get told something enough times and you start to believe it, whether it's true or not.  I didn't know what to believe about myself because there was nothing I was being told wasn't bad about me.

You could say this is when I turned to games and gaming.  I'm sure I'm not the only one who used gaming as an escape from the real world; to do things that made me feel successful and even heroic when everything else you'd been told about yourself was the opposite.  Being the only one in my family who really played games, it made me feel like I had an identity and a place, even if it didn't help me connect with anyone.  I had my sanctuary, and while it was lonely, it was something I could call mine.  This didn't last long.

My parents weren't open-minded when it came to video games.  Seeing how much time I spent with games, my parents bought into the media crazes of the time and believed I had become addicted.  Par the course, they started telling me how games were wrong for me.  Their go-to punishments became to strip away my games rather than ground me or increase my chores.  I thought I had finally found something good, but once again I was told my life consisted of only bad things.  I wouldn't give this one up though, and it became a constant battle between me and my parents.  Games were the only place I felt confident in myself, but even there I now had a layer of guilt wrapping around the back of my mind anytime I played games.

This all lasted for a few years, up until middle school started.  By then I had developed the coping mechanisms of "don't do or say anything about yourself, and don't leave any impressions with anyone, and nobody can tell you that you are wrong."  I was a wallflower.  I didn't talk with anyone, didn't share my grades, and never tried to make friends.  I stopped trying.  For anything.  I stopped caring about my grades, figuring if I only made average grades instead of good ones people couldn't call me stupid or give me flak for being too smart.  The battle between me and my parents on video games had ended by this point, with both me and them giving up.  Games were still my greatest source of comfort, but now on top of the guilt that had been ingrained earlier there was also the knowledge that every time I started playing, my parents got a little more disappointed in me, even if they didn't express it anymore.  This was my state for a few years.

It wasn't until High School that I really started to feel any better about myself.  I guess you could say I had matured a bit or was simply going through that rebellious phase where you start feeling more full of yourself, even though I was still very much a wallflower compared to my peers.  I had more than one or two people I could call a friend, and I was able to keep up in school despite everything I had been told about my gaming lifestyle, and in fact owed that lifestyle for connecting me with the friends I had found.  My parents were wrong about me, and I was now aware enough to no longer feel as much guilt in my hobbies.  But that was only half of my problem.

Remember that mindset I said I developed back in middle school?  "Don't do or say anything about yourself, and don't leave any impressions with anyone, and nobody can tell you that you are wrong?"  That never left me, even to the present day.  You have no idea how long this post has been on my mind, but I've been too scared to write it due to hating the feeling of being judged.  I never made any of those friends myself.  It was all others who for one reason or another deciding to associate with me, or me meeting them by proxy through other people I already knew.  Even in that circle of friends I was known as the quiet one because I never wanted to talk about anything besides games.  That was okay for a while, because games were what kept our circle of friends together.  But anything besides them and I didn't want to contribute anything because that would be revealing more about myself than I was comfortable with.  So it didn't help when High School was over and we all went our separate ways for college, leaving me back in that lonely, isolated place where the only thing in my life was my games, only now that I knew the joys of having other people who appreciated and understood them as I did, it felt hollow with those people gone.

I tried my hand at college, but after years of protectively-ingrained antisocial behavior combined with self-sabotaging study habits, I didn't last long.  One semester in, having passed only one of my classes and not having made any semblance of friends, I dropped out.  Needless to say I was once again a source of disappointment for my family.  And now I'm here, trudging day to day accomplishing as little as possible, with my job and the fact that I'm not living with my parents anymore being the only things giving me any sense of self-worth.  I have fun from day to day with my hobbies and I can't say I'm unhappy with my life.  But I'm not happy either.

I am who I am, but I don't like who I am.  But who I am also doesn't want to change.  I'm just as scared of trying to do something worthwhile just to end up failing again as I am that I'll continue to exist by simply getting by and being inoffensive without accomplishing anything.  I'm also just as okay with the idea that I'll never accomplish anything as I am with the prospect of never having to be subjected to the pain of disappointment, rejection, or failure again.  Worst of all though, is that I have no idea what I need to break out of these spiraling feelings.  I'm confused, and don't know what to make of my life because when I look inward, I see nothing worthwhile in myself, my past, or my future.  I just exist.

So I got cornered by this guy at work today who freaked me the feck out....

We started talking about music, radio shows, and dancing, and somehow ended up on him ranting about his ex-fiancé's "Punk good for nothing kid" who "Deserved to be castrated" (He's 13, apparently) and how much fun he has castrating cows, dogs, cats, and similar.

He also started talking about how large Cow Eurethras are.

Hold me, guys. Make the bad man go away. 

@ reaper
I'm not the best person for this.

I can relate, being an introvert growing up in western culture (seriously, its a constant media blitz telling me that the various things that define me as a person are undesirable,) but my pride and/or logic very quickly dismiss the opinions of others if I believe them to be unfounded/illogical/irrelivant. Thats the approach I would recommend you adopt. If these people do not demonstrate that they know and value you, their opinion (of you) is worthless.
 
The other half is perspective. I cannot change your perspective for you, only urge you to look untill you see something you like, and to be honest about it rather than being caught up in self pity or depression and overlooking these things (its easy to get blinkered like that). If other people don't see your value, thats their problem, not yours, but its up to you to see your own value.

my childhood was weird I start martial art when I was 5 and broke the bones of about 15 people(mostly in high school) and I learned 1 thing people are terrible but thats just me, but you should ignore most people as they are only there to hurt others

I'm sick of being unemployed and overweight. I'm doing something to help the latter, but the former is stalwart and won't budge. I've been applying to jobs, re-applying to jobs, going out to find jobs for the past two years and only recently, within the past 6 months, was I called in for an interview of a job I didn't get. There are just no jobs in my area and I've even looked an hour away from my area; still nothing.

It really blows; I want a job so I can make money and help my brother out a little.

MikailArksot wrote:I'm sick of being unemployed and overweight. I'm doing something to help the latter, but the former is stalwart and won't budge. I've been applying to jobs, re-applying to jobs, going out to find jobs for the past two years and only recently, within the past 6 months, was I called in for an interview of a job I didn't get. There are just no jobs in my area and I've even looked an hour away from my area; still nothing.

It really blows; I want a job so I can make money and help my brother out a little.

I've heard that there's a self-perpetuating unemployment cycle that means the longer you go unemployed, the harder it is to find jobs because people reviewing your work history see that 2-year gap and assume "What have they been doing all that time? This person must be lazy since they haven't worked in 2 years. I don't want to hire a lazy person," regardless of what your reasons actually are. Your unemployment becomes the reason you won't be hired.

That said, what kind of jobs are you looking for? If you're looking for something in a particular or specialized field you really want to pursue, you should probably take a break and apply for entry-level positions somewhere else first. Sure, it means working retail or service somewhere for a while, but it breaks that cycle of unemployment. Even better if you can land or work your way into a managerial position, since that gives you ammo at a better job interview besides "I was just working to get by while I looked for what I really wanted to do."

Sometimes I feel like I don't even have to write on here, you guys cover my weaknesses and fears so perfectly I am able to just read and relate.  

I was on a brief hiatus from the DkS forums because I was playing DUST 514 and getting involved with different corporations within the game. I'm no stranger to the video game community (testosterone-packed FPS communities in particular) but I still find it so surprising the treatment women receive in these communities.

In the public, everybody puts on their politically correct faces and claim they don't care what's between a person's legs as long as they are skilled players... But when it comes to the private sphere of things, you really notice that it's just a facade. How it can be so easily dismissed as "boys will be boys" really grinds my gears.

Basically, this is what happened... I joined a well-known corporation that is the spearhead of a larger alliance in the DUST 514 universe. I got invited to the Skype group for the alliance. I'm not very active there, but the one day that I am, I notice that the discussion is centered around the CEO for another corporation, who happens to be a female. The corporation she is CEO for is sizable, has been around since beta, and is part of another large alliance. I feel like somebody who has accomplished so much for the community deserves a measure of respect. Instead, the conversation was about who wanted to *** her and who didn't want to *** her (a lot of rude comments were made about how unattractive they felt she was). The conversation also included photoshopped photos of her... Yeah, I left the group. My corporation's CEO asked me why. I told him I was offended by what happened and was easily dismissed without so much of an apology (he was an active participant in the conversation). This is all just locker room talk anyway. I still feel so upset when I think about it that I haven't really been able to sort out my thoughts on the whole thing. All I know is that I don't want to be part of a community with an attitude like that.

It's hard bunny. I don't know if we'll ever grow up.

I honestly don't even care about DUST 514 anymore.

When some girl on the DUST 514 forums created a female-only channel for females to chat and squad together, there was a huge hoopla over it being "sexist". Apparently it was sexist for females to want to play with other females in a male-dominated game. Okay.

I have made friends with quite a few gamer girls and I find it ridiculous how they are usually treated. Me and a friend sometimes take counts of how many games in a row she will be hit on or made a sexist joke to. The highest it got was 15, and I am pretty sure that is just because we were the only ones talking then.

Oddly enough, like the forum you were on she is part of a clan of only female gamers.

They make fun of me. ._.

Basically I understand the frustration, and have more then once gone off on a guy for being sexist against gamer girls or making rude sex jokes to one of them.

All female exclusive groups can be pretty bothersome, I remember being unable to play with a friend on WoW because of that and how serious her all female guild was.

Similar to an all male guild.  Or an all white guild.  Or an all Hispanic guild.  Why separate people in such ways?

because people like to be superior or feel superior but I dont have a problem will all female guilds/groups as long as the dont go to far. But as for more gamers well most of them are some of the worst people youll find well as far as fps games go so I would just ignore them

It's still never fun to hear about a good guild that your friend is in, then ask about joining to have someone go.  "So why do you play as a male Orc, for Roleplaying or something?"  And go, "Huh?  I just like Orcs, and I'm a guy.  So I went Orc."  Then being told you can't join a guild because you have a penis when you wanted to just play with your friend and raid.  I had credentials, I was a well known Death Knight that would tank for raids, and had a healer alt which could easily replace a missing healer.  I had top tier gear, and even when I was talking with the member they were interested in recruiting me.  But once I said I was a man, suddenly everything changed.  It made me feel pretty rejected for just being a man.  Maybe it doesn't happen as often and women want to be away from the douches, but not all men are douches just like how not all female gamers suck like some think.  I don't like it, I don't like gender exclusive clubs at all.

I can't believe I'm about to open up about this to random people on a forum where hardly anyone knows me, but here goes:

Basically, I've never had a girlfriend. I'm 21 years old, and I've never known what that's like. Sad, huh? It's probably because I've never been a very social person, but when I do actually try my hardest be social and get to know someone, they always turn me down. I might be somewhat socially awkward and people say I'm not confident enough, but I think I have some good qualities, too.

I'm not expecting anyone to care at all about my problems, but I would be really grateful to anyone who would be willing to listen. Be warned, however, that it's a very long story.

I'm all ears, 4Kings.

Thanks. I'm just not sure where to begin, though.